


The Cake Thing

by CheyanneChika



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Birthday Cake, Gen, Precious Peter Parker, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Cannot Bake, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark's Bots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-25
Updated: 2020-07-25
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:08:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25501153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CheyanneChika/pseuds/CheyanneChika
Summary: Tony attempts to bake because he can totally bake for Peter...right? No.  Well, he can make a bot that can bake.
Relationships: Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Comments: 5
Kudos: 47





	The Cake Thing

**Author's Note:**

  * For [zessa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/zessa/gifts).



> Happy Birthday, Zessa!!!!! Thanks to all the peeps who gave me ideas for this <3

Tony had to admit the explosion was a surprise.

Honestly.

How was he supposed to know that the bot, developed precisely to measure ingredients, would get upset when the AI he installed in the mixer started mixing said ingredients.

This all started because he just wanted to make Peter happy. So really this was all his fault.

…thirteen days earlier…

“Boss, you asked me to remind you when Peter Parker’s birthday was two weeks away,” FRIDAY called during the horrid lull where he had to walk from a conference room to one of his labs.

Tony frowned for a moment. “Whatever’s on his Amazon list, just buy it all.”

“Peter doesn’t have a list, Boss.”

Tony entered the elevator and frowned. “When is he coming by again?”

“He is currently in Lab 2.”

A smile quirked his lips. “Guess I’m going to Lab 2.”

The elevator closed.

…

“What do you want for your birthday?”

Peter squeaked and ended up on the ceiling. “Mr. Stark! You scared me.”

“We need to reevaluate your spidey sense,” Tony told him, arms crossed.

Peter dropped back down to floor. “Sorry Mr. Stark.”

Tony just shrugged it off. “You didn’t answer my question.”

Peter paused, playing back the conversation. “Oh uhm…cake?”

Tony sighed playfully. “That’s a given. A nice three-tier chocolate and raspberry on one and—”

“Uh, no no, I um…I just like regular cake, you know, that gets baked in an oven.”

“Sounds exhausting.”

Peter laughed. “I’ll love anything you get me—not that you have to get me anything, that’s not what I’m saying, I just—”

Tony held up a hand. “Got it.”

Peter fell silent and grinned. “What are we doing today?”

“The same thing we do every day.”

“Try to take over the world?”

Tony, who’d started to lean over a table, straightened to look askance at his protégé.

“It’s from this really old cart—never mind.”

…five days before Peter’s birthday…

The cake thing was nagging at him. He wasn’t sure he could make a cake perfectly on his own. He could probably hire Wolfgang Puck to make the cake but…

Test cake one:

“Why does it taste like garbage?”

“I believe you may have used all baking soda instead of baking soda and baking powder.”

“They aren’t the same thing?”

Test cake two:

“I think there was too much cocoa powder.”

Test cake three:

“It’s not supposed to be on fire is it?”

“I’ve asked DUM-E to bring a fire extinguisher.”

Test cake nine:

“Boss, if you set off the fire alarm again, I believe former SHIELD Director Fury will show up to “disabuse you of the notion that your security is flawless, even during an emergency”.”

“Eyepatch did not say that.”

“No. Ms. Hill said that. I believe she was extrapolating information from what Fury actually said.”

“…Which was?”

“Unfortunately, the scrambler he used made most of his side of the conversation too garbled for me to make out.”

Test cake seventeen:

“I didn’t actually think you would allow DUM-E to leave the lab.”

“Sorry, Boss, but he insisted.”

…One day before Peter’s birthday…

Tony fabricated a clone of DUM-E’s shape, but didn’t bother with an AI, just programming to take exact measurements, put them into a bowl and put the bowl into the electric mixer.

He put an AI loaded with information about the proper mixing techniques for every cake recipe on the Food Network site and on Pinterest into the mixer.

The bot measured everything perfectly and deposited it all into the mixing bowl. The mixer started to mix.

This, of course, ruined all the perfect calculations and the bot would have to start over. It made to take the bowl back to separate all the ingredients again. The mixer panicked and yanked up, sending powders and egg everywhere.

“FRIDAY?”

“Yes, Boss?”

“Do not summon DUM-E.”

“Sure thing, Boss.”

“Uh, Mr. Stark?” Tony spun round to face Peter with too wide eyes. A poof of flour fluffed into the air as he turned. “FRIDAY said you needed help?”

“Traitor,” Tony growled. “I don’t need any help, Underoos.”

“Oh uh, I brought Aunt May’s Betty Crocker book, but I can just go.”

Tony’s blank expression cracked. “Come on, then.”

They made the cake. It was lumpy and probably too sweet, but they enjoyed it nonetheless.

“I’ll still buy you a proper cake for your birthday, tomorrow.” Tony said finally. They’d eaten the entire cake, a couple of pizzas and were working their way through the food coma.

“Uh, Mr. Stark? Today is my birthday. I came by after going out with Aunt May. FRIDAY said you were super busy and could use my help and to bring a cookbook.”

There was a very long pause. “FRIDAY? How long was I trying to bake cakes?”

“You’re seventeen attempts spanned over four days and the bot fabrication, AI installation in the mixer and programming both took two days.”

“…Did I sleep at any point?”

“You slept four hours during attempt eleven, and six hours during bot fabrication.”

Tony sighed. 

“This was perfect,” Peter murmured. 

Tony looked over to see the teen smiling at him. He gave him a small smile back. “Happy birthday, Pete.”

…

Pepper did not kill them in the morning, but it was a very near thing. 

The kitchen had to be entirely scoured, the mixer replaced, and the bot repurposed. But Peter had left smiling and that was what had mattered.

  



End file.
